It’s NOT okay that I am NOT okay! - - Sense of UNDERSTANDING(Part 2)

In years of pursuit for our self-improvement or personal development, I should know the reason of my episode of depression right? WRONG

From 2017, Abbey and I keep thinking and digging from time to time but we always faced the same roadblock. Aspects that were presented do not make sense what could be the main cause of that deep and pitless darkness.

In 2021, I volunteered to be the data analyst of Peak Resonance, a coaching company for personal, career, relationship or I just say life development as a whole. In return for my researches they offered free sessions with the coaches. But I pride myself that I know I do not need a coach because I know myself more than anyone else and I have Abbey to check on me too. RIGHT? Hmmm, well AGAIN IT IS WRONG!

One casual day, while Jovan (one of Peak Resonance founder) is talking about our research material, the subject of my 2017 loneliness was brought up. He asked only three questions and from that time the burden on looking for its cause was lifted off from my shoulder and Abbey’s.

Now I know why executives, why ranking officials, why people are turning to licensed coaches for answers..for guidance..for deeper self connections. Indeed they were trained to ask questions for you to befriend and master your trigger points, they have tools that explain your characters and emotions, they will mold you in a person that you want to be.

I am truly forever grateful with Jovan and I know ALMIGHTY moved because it is time for me to know the reason of my depression and for me to avoid those trigger points specially in this UNCERTAIN COVID times.

Now I am absolutely rooting for this kind of interference. Coaching will save you time in figuring things out and will definitely help you to ease up everything in your subconscious mind.

***

Peak Resonance

(W) https://peak-resonance.com

(E) contact@peak-resonance.com

(T) +65 9694 7320

It’s NOT okay that I am NOT okay! -- Succumbed in a Great Sadness (Part 1)

I am sad. Bakit? Hindi ko alam! 

I do not have time to talk to others. Why? Because there’s a voice inside na walang tigil akong sinasabihan na dapat akong maging malungkot, na wala akong karapatan maging masaya. 

It is a battle inside. And hanggang ngayon naalala ko ang pain. No! Actually it is not only pain. It is a sorrowful feeling of very deep loneliness na hindi ko alam saan nanggagaling. If you have felt heartbreak, that week of misery is worse than that. It felt like my ownself is tearing me apart. Pinupunit ang puso ko. 

I tried to reach out for help from my sister and sister-in-law and they gave me words of wisdom that made me realize better things pero the enemy inside of me is stronger. (D@mn! I am now in a bus writing this and I am crying silently). 

Kailan nangyari ito? That was 2017. The feelings still seems fresh everytime I am looking back. 

One week I never talked to my husband. I wake up, go to office, go home, eat dinner and sleep. I am cold as damn Antartica. I pity him. Kasi alam ko wala naman sya kasalanan pero nadadamay sya sa nangyayari sa akin. I know I make Abbey sad too pero that time wala akong pakialam sa nararamdaman nya. But he continues to cook for me, arrange my baon and waiting for me to come back.

I am grumpy too sa office kasi ayaw ko nga na may kakausap sa akin. Nakakatitig lang ako lagi sa monitor that time. My friends do not know about it. Ayaw ko nga kasi ng kausap. Talagang si Ate Sol and Ate Precy lang ang sinabihan ko nun. Isang tawag lang. Pero that call seems my enemy became more agitated and pushed me harder to the point na yung mga positive words and insights galing sa mga ate is now turning against me.

I do not have time to pray. The voice insisted I am not worthy to pray. Not worthy of anything good in this Earth and in Heaven.

All I know, one afternoon I decided to stop believing sa mga naririnig ko. That I need to go out of the cocoon of misery. That same day, I send SMS to Abbey for the first time after a week to pick me up from the office.

The best thing my husband did that time was to support me. He kept his silence, never asked questions. Nag-sorry and I thank him for all the understanding. 

Is that depression? I do not know. Basta isang araw nagising lang ako and I was succumbed in a great sadness..in darkness.. It is not okay that I am not okay. Kasi hindi lang sarili ko nasasaktan pati mga taong nakapaligid sa akin. 

5 Signs You Should Quit Your Job

Yep! It is time to cut the misery off and quit your job! 

Now, on this day counts my 3rd month of sabbatical leave. 

Because I am free and open for communication right now, haha, people are sending me congratulatory messages that I have an opportunity to rest for a while. But others just ranted away! Of course, I listen to what they say. And now I am compiling it. This will help you to DECIDE why you should leave your job NOW! 

Below are some of the reasons you are burnt out or everyday you ask yourself why you are still staying on that company. 

1. You feel lightheaded every time you're on your way to office.

- You feel the stress welcoming you every time you punch-in. Your blood pressure strikes on top of your head. Aha! You are starting to be physically sick because of the anxiety inside the office. 

2. Your personality transforms automatically when you open the glass door! 

- From always smile to always grumpy! You become defensive and a lot of F*** word accommodating your brain and spilling it out from your mouth. Lunch break and 5PM bells, you will come back to your best and original you!

3. No growth. 

-Some people felt stuck because there is no development happening for their skills or knowledge. You should quit now if your department head wants you to sit there and do your job and no plans to have an improvement for you. 

4. Disrespect is all over the room. 

-Your boss disrespects you and you give a hell back to him. Your manager do not show empathy on you. Your supervisors always point finger. You do not feel secured and appreciated. Shouting is the "only" communication you know to be heard. 

5. Politics is in all time high! 

-Gossiping is your favorite dessert on your tea time and your boss plays favoritism. 

Please have respect and dignity to yourself.
Just quit! 

Well, that's it! Now it is time for you to think.

Bubblews - My Online Sanctuary (CLOSED)

I stumbled upon one of a blogpost that listed of a scam-free website that you can swag some cash. Bubblews caught my attention and I instantly join the site. 

My first account was flagged as a spam for just 2 days. I know! It is my fault! I just ticked the term and conditions and don't bothered to read the rules and regulations. Charged it to experience. Luckily, they accepted me back. 

On my second account under @WillOfAbbey, I read and reread all the things that I must learn. I am back with more cautious postings. I created connections and relationships with other "Bubblers". They always help and guide me. 

One of my key goal beside earning some cash is to be "featured". My deadline for me to attain that is before my first anniversary. But hey! I was awarded before I hit my first month. I am on a cloud nine when I saw that "FEATURED" letters pasted below my post. 

I love Bubblews. It is a sanctuary of positive data and information. You will learn a lot from different people. I love Bubblews! This is my bubble online. Join us! Earn money with us!

100% Examination ng Balikbayan Box. Anong Totoong Nakakatakot Dun?

Alam po namin na ginagawa lang ng mga kababayan nating mga taga-Bureau of Customs ang kanilang mga tungkulin. Hindi po sa ayaw sumunod ng mga OFW sa batas, ang problema po eh di po pinapaalam sa mga tao ang batas na dapat naming sundin. 

Hangga't di pa po nailalabas ang revision na sinasabi nila for Customs Memorandum Order #79-90 ito po ang mga dapat alamin ng mga kapwa natin na nagpapabagahe:

Q: Bakit nga ba nagpapa-box ang mga OFW?

---> Alam ng lahat ng mga tao na normal sa mga OFW na magpadala ng box sa Pinas. At alam ito ng mga taga-Customs kaya nga sila gumawa ng batas regarding dyan para maiwasan ang smuggling sa bawat balikbayan box.

Q: Bakit ngayon lang naghihigpit?

---> Kasi po marami na ang nagsasamantala. May mga nagpapadala ng bawal katulad ng mga baril at kung anu-ano pa. Ito rin naman po ay para sa kapakanan ng buong bayan. Safety ng mga tao. 

Q: 100% Examination/Random Inspection nasa katwiran ba?

---> Opo, may katwiran. Nakasaad po yan sa 79-90: 3.3.1.

3.3.1 Regular Examination - where the Consignor's Export Declaration and Packing List is attached to the box/package containing the individual consignment/shipment, the assigned Customs examiner may conduct the examination at random and, thereby, make a speedy determination whether the contents correspond with the packing list.  

100% Examination - A thorough 100% examination shall be conducted where - 

3.3.1.1 The Consignor's Export Declaration and Packing List is not attached to the box/package; or

3.3.1.2 The consolidated shipment is covered by a duly issued derogatory alert/information; or when in the course of conducting the regular examination a violation/discrepancy is found which warrants the issuance of WSD, Provided that either case, the provisions of CMO No. 65-89, dated 12 July 1989, shall be duly and strictly complied.

---> May karapatan ang mga taga-Customs na halughugin kahit po ang conta-container na mga shipments lalo na po kung may Alert Order o ang Packing List/Invoice eh hindi tugma. 

Q: Ano ang dapat gawin para maiwasan na mapatawan ng extra duties and taxes? 

3.5 Limitations 

3.5.1 As to Value ---- U$500.00

3.5.2 As to Quantity 

3.5.2.1 Foodstuffs such as canned goods, grocery items, etc. ---- 1 dozen a kind

3.5.2.2 Wearing apparel and clothing material not exceeding 3 yards per cut, whether used or new ---- 1 dozen of a kind 

3.5.2.3 Other household personal effects, whether used or new ----- 1 dozen of a kind 

3.5.3 Number of box/packages ----- 1

3.5.4 As to frequency --- One individual consignment per consignor/sender during 6-month period. 

Provided that, home appliances, whether used or new, shall be disallowed, and provided further that, any consignments/shipment entered in violation limits herein fixed shall be automatically be subjected to seizure proceedings without prejudice to the cancellation/revocation of the certificate of registration of Freight Forwarder/Consolidator as well as cancellation of the accreditation of the Breakbulk/Consolidation Agent;

Provided, however that in case of consolidated shipments consisting of personal and household effects and used home appliances belonging to returning Filipino residents and overseas contract workers, and accompanying them to their return or arriving within a reasonable time, the privileges granted under Executive Order No. 206 dated June 30, 1987 subject to the conditions hereunder shall remain granted to Filipinos coming to settle in the Philippines who are now residents or citizens of other countries under existing laws with respect to their personal and household effect accompanying them on their return or arriving within a reasonable time shall in no way be prejudiced by this Order, and Provided finally that the overseas Filipinos is advised to avail the privileges under R.A. No. 6788 that allows them to purchase good duty and tax free up to the amount of US $1,000.00 at philippine duty free shops once a year.  

---> Ang mga sumusunod po sa taas ang dapat tandaan. Halimbawa po hanggang isang dosena lang po ang pwede nating padala na corned beef, isang dosenang canned sausage, isang dosenang sabon at kung anu-ano pa. Ang lalampas po dun ay mapapatawan na po ng duties and taxes. Bawal na bawal po ang mga appliances. At ang mahuhulihan na mga forwarders, kapag ang kanilang senders ay lumalabag sa batas na ito, ay maaaring makansela ang mga accreditation to transact in Bureau of Cutsoms.

Ang mga sumusunod po ang dapat nating tuparin. Kung tayo ay susunod wala po tayong dapat ikabahala. :) 

Q: Pero ano nga ba talaga ang kinakatakot natin kapag binuksan ang mga box?

--->Ang nakawan. Kasi sa totoo lang, kapag sinabi na po ng forwarders natin na "binuksan kasi ng customs" at may nawala eh wala na po talagang mahahabol ang OFW. Kaya ang tanging maipapayo po dyan eh kumuha ng maayos na freight forwarders. Yung tipong tututok sa bawat bagahe na bubuksan, yung may malasakit sa mga kliyente nilang OFW. Kasi madalas pa sa minsan eh mga tao mismo sa loob ng freight forwarders ang nagnanakaw ng mga laman ng bagahe. 

Maging mahinahon tayo. Alamin ang batas. Pumili ng maayos ng freight forwarder. :)

To Taylor, Love Jealous Wife

24^th of July my husband went berserk when he got to know that you will visit again Singapore and he was delighted more that the concert was dated days before his 32^nd birthday. My husband assumes and feels that you knew his birthday and this came in no coincidence... that you planned it.

How crazy my husband to your angelic face and your songs? Well, when he proposed to me he always sing your “Love Story” and until we got married it resonates in my head. He plays your album in iMac, watches your mtvs in your vevo, and every time he got to listen in a store that is playing your music, he will stop awhile and stays until your song finishes. 

Do you know Taylor that my 3 siblings will be going here in Singapore to visit me and we arranged to go to Kuala Lumpur on the exact date of your concert? But when my husband and my siblings got to know about your concert they scrapped the KL plan and chose to see you perform. Gosh! All the time I spent in studying our itinerary was wasted. I obliged as majority voted for you. 

We waited for the ticket came on sale last June 30, at 10AM, me and my officemate tried to access the site but all our efforts were futile. We tried and tried to the extent that another colleague joined and help me to go through the ticketing sytem. Until on the night, I gave up. My husband told me that he is also trying and the sadness settled in his face.

Do not get me wrong that I am happy that we never got your ticket. 

Actually I fell in love to your music when you launched your 1989 album. It made me swing my hips and sing your song. Maybe someday, my husband will see you. In HIS perfect and sweet time.

Bless you more girl. A lot of people looking up for you as an inspiration and you put a lot of smiles in many people's face including mine.

Love,

Jealous BUT Happy Wife

How To Teach an 8 Year-Old to Save Money

I want my nephews and niece to learn the value of money. And on their age of 7 to 8 eh mas madaling tamnan ang utak nila sa mga ganitong financial education. 

Hindi ko naman sila pwedeng turuan agad mag-stocks and i-discuss sa kanila kung sila ba ay for long term investors or for traders. The best I can teach them as of now is how to save.

Para ganahan ang mga bata na mag-ipon, I challenged them na kung sino ang pinakamadaming ipon ay tatapatan ko ang amount. So it means na mado-doble ang pera nila. 

So when my husband and I arrived Manila last June, handang-handa na ang alikansya nila. And they are bugging from morning until we are having dinner. Their alikansya, made from woods and bamboo, are always in front of my face. Haha. So after dinner, we open one-by-one. 

First we open Hannah's wooden house. It only costs Php140, Baste have Php837, and Sam saved Php782. Close fight within the two boys. When they saw how little Hannah saved, Baste and Sam cites why she have a meager amount. Hannah showed a sad face and I decided to double all the amount of their savings. I declared Baste won the challenge. 

Habang nanonood ako ng tv, Baste came to me and asked me a question that shocked and made me laugh. 

Baste: Tita Wil kelan ka ulit babalik?

Me: Next year. Why? 

Baste: Kelan mo ulit dodoblehin alikansya namin?

Me: Why?

Baste: Kasi ung binigay mo po na pera ngayon isasama ko sa ipon ko para pag balik mo dodoblehin mo ulit pera ko.

Me: Ate Sol yung anak mo balak ako lutuin sa sarili kong mantika. Haha!

Children loves to compete and loves to receive rewards. Try this to your child and their cousins. :) It's fun. 

Dear Main Tenants... (Singapore HDB/Condos Room for Rent)

Dear Main Tenants...

Main Tenants po ang tawag sa mga tao na directly na nakikipagusap sa mga agents or landlords to rent their house. Sila ang nakapirma sa mga Tenancy Agreements. And on that they are the one responsible in any thing that may happen to that HDB/Condo property.

As Filipino Expat, we chose to rent only a room, not a full flat. Why? It will be a great saving for us. So kasama sa pag-upa ng room lang eh kailangan makisama sa iba pang nakatira sa bahay na iyon. And it is never been a problem sa amin. I chose to post this blog to let all the main tenants or may ari ng bahay na makisama din sana sila sa lahat na kasama nila sa loob ng bahay. Both ends should adjust and meet in the middle.

Main tenant ka ba? Basahin mo ito. Baka kaya walang tumatagal na mag-stay sa mga kwarto mo eh dahil ganito ka or mga ganito ang nangyayari sa loob ng bahay.

1. As your tenant, inuupahan namin ang kwarto and lahat ng tao sa bahay should respect its own privacy. Huwag kayong basta na lang papasok sa room at sana pagsabihan ninyo din ang anak ninyo. Baka feeling ng anak niyo extension yun ng kwarto ninyo. Haha! Knock-knock muna bago pumasok.

2. Main tenants huwag maging gahaman sa space ok? Sa common area like sala, kitchen and storage area dapat hati-hati. Huwag mong i-hug lahat. May mga gamit din ang tenants mo na hindi pwede sa loob ng kwarto like kawali, sapatos or maruming damit.

3. Alam mo naman siguro ate/kuya ang oras ng pasok ng mga nangungupahan sa mga kwarto ninyo. Baka naman pwede huwag kayong magpatutog ng malakas na radyo, mag-drums or mag-piano. Pwede naman yan kung lahat ay gising na. Or use headseats na lang for your own pleasure.

4. Do not tell us na wala dapat bayad ang bata sa utilities. Sa dinami-dami ng mga gadgets ng anak mo, maya't-maya ang ligo, palit diaper, pakulo ng tubig, sterilize ng dede at charge ng kotse nilang laruan eh mas malaki pa ang kinukunsumo nila sa mga tenants mong maghapong wala sa bahay.

5. BABALA: Huwag dayain ang resibo ng PUB. Madaming AXS Machine na nakakalat. All we have to do is scan the barcode. Baka sa ginagawa mong yan eh mahagupit ka pa ng yantok sa Changi Prison.

6. Kapag may rules ka like wag tulo-tulo ang sampay, buksan lagi ang exhaust fan pag magluluto, laging i-lock ang main door at kung anu-ano pa eh siguraduhin mong pati ikaw sumusunod. Huwag double-standard mga kapatid.

7. Andito kami para mag-ipon kaya lahat ng tipid ginagawa ng OFW. I-solve ang issue sa loob ng bahay like pagkawala ng bigas, cooking oil or sabon panlaba, gadgets, damit pati sandwich wrap. Or baka may iba kayong dahilan bakit hindi naso-solve ang "disappearing cases".

8. May gamit ka pero gagasgasin mo eh yung gamit ng iba. Kapag nasira na yung hiniram mo, at ikaw na ang hinihiraman eh nakasimangot ka. Anong klase namang ugali yan?

9. Kung makikigamit ka ng pass ng tenants ninyo siguraduhin ninyo na babayaran ang bills. Huwag hayaan na magkaron ng pangit na credit history ang ibang tao dahil lang sayo. Ay teka! Bakit ka nga ba nakikigamit ng ibang pangalan? Blacklisted na kayo malamang sa lahat ng networks dito sa Singapore dahil sa failure to make payments. Mga kababayan huwag basta-basta magpahiram ng credit card or IC. Ok?

10. Nagtataka ba kayo bakit yung iba ayaw magpa-upa sa couples with kids? Yun ay dahil sa ingay. Hindi porke ikaw ang main tenant eh okay lang minu-minuto nagbubulahaw sa iyak ang anak mo. Baby yan, natural yan. Kaya sana pag ngumangawa na eh ipasok mo na sa kwarto ninyo ng para makulong ang ingay. Hindi yung umiiyak sa loob ng kwarto eh papalabasin niyo pa kasi kayo mismo naiingayan.

Lagi mong isipin ate/kuya paano kung sa inyo gawin ang mga gnagawa ninyo? Huwag laging pakamig. Kasi ang mga nagpaparaya eh nagsasawa din. Baka kamukat-mukat ninyo nakakalat na mga mukha ninyo sa social media bewaring mga tao na umupa sa inyo. Sige ka!

Sa mga katulad kong nangungupahan kung di nyo na talaga kaya ang rules sa loob ng bahay eh umalis na lang kayo. Ang daming bahay/room for rent nowadays. Ngayon ay panahon ay buyers' market pwede ka na mag-haggle ng upa. Sa amin ngang lilipatan ang rate ay $3700 for the whole flat natawaran ng $3000.

Magmuni-muni guys for harmonious relationship sa loob ng bahay. :) 

Financially-Happily Ever After

Madaming tao nagtatanong sa akin ano ang tingin ko sa kanilang mga problema sa puso. Hindi as sakit ha kundi relasyon sa knilang mga boyfriend/girlfriend o mga asawa. Nuon ganun lang. Ngayon dahil malamang lahat ng kakilala ko ay may mga asawa na, hindi maiiwasan na tanungin din nila ako ng mga usapin tungkol sa budgeting nmin mag-asawa. 

Nung nag-share ako ng pasasalamat sa Financial Group 2nd Anniversary year-end party, yung iba nagulat nung sinabi ko na kanya-kanya kaming hawak ng pera ni Abbey. Hindi na yun bago sa mga talagang malalapit sa amin. Pero syempre yung mga kakakilala pa lang eh bukod sa gulat eh madami din tanong. Tulad ng... 
1. Paano mo malalaman kung sobra na ang pinapadala ng asawa mo sa pamilya nya
2. Paano mo malalaman kung anu-ano pinagkakagastusan ni mister. 
3. Baka mamaya may kalaguyo na yan. Ikaw din. 
4. Sino ang nagiipon para sa future ninyo? 
At kung anu-ano pa. 

But for me financially-happily ever after evolves in different values of human. Basahin mo ung mga susunod at magkaron ka ng check-list. 

TRUST
I trust Abbey's decisions how to spend his hard earned money. My father even told me way back before "Ang asawa mo nagiisip bago gumastos."  He even have an app to monitor his monthly expenses. 

"Nakapagpadala na tayo para kila papa.", monthly yan na maririnig ko sa asawa ko. Pag hindi nya nabanggit for 1st week ako na magtatanong kung naitransfer na nya na ba ung para sa kanila.Sa side ko? He knew it all. We only have one account in remittance center and it was named after him. So, every month when I am giving money for my dad and mom's monthly allowance he is always asking "Hindi mo dadagdagan?". 

Diba? Sarap ng mga ganyan klaseng tanungan? Kaysa sa "Nagbigay ka na naman sa pamilya mong batugan!". Haha! 

HONESTY
Maging tapat sa isa't-isa kung magkano ang pumapasok at magkano ang lumalabas. In that way, you and your spouse can both adjust. Baka kasi yung partner mo buong katawan at utak ay pagod na pagod na kakatrabaho para kumita ng pera, ikaw naman bili dun at kain dito ang inaatupag para lang may ma-ipost sa facebook. 

Alam ni Abbey ang sahod ko at ganun din ako sa sahod nya. Pero we do not get the habit na i-check ng i-check ang mga bank accounts ng isa't-isa. We know each other's passwords pero dahil nga walang dahilan para magsinungaling eh it is only a waste of time to see if the amount debited and payslip is totally the same. 

Na-save na ang oras ninyo wala ka pang sakit sa damdamin kakahinala. 

COMMUNICATION
Usap-usap din pag may time. Mali! Dapat laging magusap. 

Baka naman kaya hindi maaayos-ayos ang buhay ninyo kasi ayaw nyo upuan. Baka naman bubuka pa lang ang bibig ni mister para pagusapan ang gastusin eh nakasinghal ka na kaagad. 

Naalala ko ung housemate ng kaibigan ko dito sa Singapore nung tinanong niya ako about sa telenovela kung ano na ang nangyari. Sabi ko pasensya na di ako nanood ng mga drama. Ang point ko lang, imbes na ubusin niyo ang oras niyo pakikipagtitigan sa tv eh bakit hindi kayo mag-usap mag-asawa? At sana kapag mag-usap kayo eh magpakumbaba kung may mali man kayo at yung may tama naman ay wag maninigaw. 

Gawin nating lahat ng may pagmamahal. Alalahanin ninyo asawa ninyo ang kausap nyo hindi ninyo treasurer or sekretarya. 

HIYA
Mukha akong magastos pero kung kilala nyo ako eh sasabihin ninyo na "tsani" ako. Tulad ni Abbey bago ako bumili eh nagiisip ako ng madaming beses kung kailangan ko ba ang bagay na yun. Kung matipid ka hindi lang sa salita kundi sa gawa eh mahihiya ang partner mo na gumastos sa walang katuturan. 

Walanghiya din ako alam nyo ba yun? Si Abbey bago nagkaroon ng iPad/iMac madami akong tanong kung bakit nya kailangan. Makalipas ang 3 buwan pumayag ako at maraming kundisyon. Kailangan nya ma-100% ang exam nya at kailangan ay sa IT show namin bilhin para kung hindi man discounted eh madaming makuha na freebies. 

COMPATIBILITY
I am so blessed to have a husband which complements my goals in life. I am so blessed that I have my own cheerleader. Every time I lay a plan, he never tells a "no". He always tell na "I think this would be better."  

We both believe in investing and aiming for an early retirement. We are in the same page when it comes helping people in need and we learned to harden our heart when lazy people are asking for funds. Ayaw namin sana maging dahilan ng pag-aawayan ay pera. 

Dati tuwing magkukuwento ako gaano ako kaswerte sa asawa ko kasi mag-apat na taon na kami kasal eh wala pa talagang away na nagaganap sa amin; ngayon na-realize ko na may away na pala. Tinawagan ko siya sa trabaho nun at nanggigigil ko syang tinanong, "Nag-withdraw ako kanina, lumaki yung balance ng account ko. Dinagdagan mo na naman pera ko 'no?". 

Ang asawa ko nasa kabilang linya. Tumatawa. Ang cute-cute ko daw. Haha! 

We are both thankful to our parents who set good financial values in us. Kung nagkulang ang nanay at tatay mo sa pangangaral sayo about sa money management eh di pa huli ang lahat para matuto. 

Mas maigi ang magtanong kesa magmarunong. Kaya sana bago magpakasal eh mapag-usapan ninyo ang mga bagay na pinansyal. Makikita mo dun kung magiging asset ba ang magiging asawa mo or liability, magiging cheerleader mo ba sya o greatest critic, magiging masaya ka ba pagtapos ng kasal o kinabukasan pagtapos ninyong mag-"I DO" ay baon ka na sa utang. 

Isip-isip...

Tandaan, ang isa sa kadalasang dahilan ng paghihiwalay ng mga mag-aasawa eh pera. 

2014: On HIS Grace

Me: Why is your face like that?
Colleague: Because I am sad.
Me: Why are you sad?
Colleague: You know, sometimes you will wake up and feel unhappy.
Me: Why?
Colleague: Don't tell me it didn't happened to you before.
Me: It happens to me. But not a lot. And whenever it occurs, I asked my husband to sing. Oh! I'll call my husband, I will ask him to sing for you.

Then she smiled. And every time I see her she always tells me that she's happy and no need to call my hubby. Haha.

*******

This 2014 many hurdles were set on our way. We were tested financially, emotionally and our trust to ALMIGHTY.

Some were the events that can break me and my husband but we chose to cling more to each other and jumped together these hurdles.

--> This year my mother-in-law won her battle with cancer. No more pain, she's in the hands of the LORD.

You can see how wrecked he is inside. He still hopes for her to heal but all the medical facts shows the opposite. "Do you have any regrets that's why you can't let her go", I asked Abbey. He replied back "No". Then after that he woke up from reality that we need to accept the fact about Mama's case. Abbey flew back and forth to Manila to spend more time with Mama. We Skype-d, call and sms Mama everyday. We want her to feel how much we love her. We always asked her "Mama love mo kami? Hanggang saan? Proud ka ba sa amin?" She will answer back with a snobbish tone. Malamanng nakukulitan na yun sa amin. Haha! 

My mother-in-law proved how easy to deal with this infamous disease if you all give all your worries to HIM.

--> My father hit by a mild stroke and this made our family bond stronger. Every family member had done their part. My sister and Kuya Laleng gave their time to be with father while he is on ICU and Kuya Ric took care of the medical bill through the help of Philhealth. Me? I flew back home to clean my dad's 4-storey house. Haha! Mission accomplished.

--> ALMIGHTY's grace shone on us again when the lymphoma of my sister-in-law was detected in an early stage. HE again proved that HE owns the richness in this world. From first session up to the eighth, Ate Rizbeth's chemotherapy was finished. THE ALMIGHTY provided it with no hesitation.

Blessings poured to Ate Riz. From siblings, relatives, churchmates, friends, government organizations and even private companies helped financially. "Kahit kailan ang DIOS ko ay hindi nagkulang". 

Despite of her condition, Abbey and I got a good chance to spend with Ate Rizbeth and her family here in Singapore not only once but twice!!! :)

--> My grandmother passed away. I am happy. All sufferings were done and she left wonderful memories for me to reminisce.

The day that I went to visit her and she asked if she can have my earrings. When I handed the pair of gold to her she eyed for my ring. I refused to give it to her. Why? "Lola, wedding ring po namin ito ni Abbey." She looked to my husband and gave a hilarious laugh. Haha! Everytime I phoned Lola, she always say a simple "Salamat sa lahat. Buti ka pa di mo ako nalilimutan". (Shocks I wanna cry).

I do not regret anything as I know I have done and gave the best I could as her granddaughter. And I know she is proud of me and my husband.

Happiness is a choice as also your sadness. You can't totally avoid problems to come your way but you can choose the problem to be a blessing rather an obstacle.

Everything happens for a reason and I hope this post help you to see more light than darkness in every challenge we encountered.

Choose to be happy. 

Kiyosaki's Cash Flow : The Missing Sector

A lot of people know the famous cash flow quadrant illustrated and made popular by Robert Kiyosaki. But if you do not know what is the meaning of the diagram above I will explain to you in the most simple way I can do.

Let’s start with the left side of the quadrant.. The Poor Side

E = Employee
We were trained in our schools to be a good employee. Am I right? I know I am right. Parents always tell their children to go to school, get high grades and you will land in a good job with high pay. I do not despise being an employee. I am also an employee until now. I love being in this sector. With ups and downs of the business I am still here and getting my monthly salary. But I need to sit in the office for 200 hours a month; take the commands of my boss, please the customers, cooperate with colleagues, beat deadlines, etc.. etc.. For me this is a challenge to conquer every day. And I am happy for the current company I am with.

But in this quadrant the earnings are restricted. Almost all time of your day was occupied by your job. You must work so you can earn.

What if you cannot work anymore?

S = Self-employed
This is where my siblings were trained for. They have their businesses. They are their own boss. Their income depends on how hard they work.

Multi-Level Marketing is definitely in this sector.

I tried to be like them and because I saw there is a lot of money to be harvested in there but in 6 months I surrendered. I had my own computer shop back then and even it is generating money I chose to close it down because I am not happy to be in there; totally tied up and doing all the necessary paper works and thinking how to get the business going. Stressful!

I will repeat my question from employee's group. What if you cannot work anymore?

Now, let's jump to the right side... To Rich and Financially Free Side

B = Business Owner
So what's the difference between self-employed and Business Owner? You are a self-employed if your business cannot run without you. Business Owner is a person whose business keeps going even without his direct supervision.

Sounds relaxing right? It is not hard to jump from the left side to this quadrant. It is so easy. You just need the proper knowledge in the business and get the most trusted people you know. Utilize their time and pay them for the work they have done for you and your industry.

How do I know it is simple. Me and my husband have rental apartment business in the Philippines. I asked my dad to work for me and pay him for every project we build. He supervises the construction and thinks how to lessen the expenses building them. My sister does the necessary paperworks in city hall, Meralco and Maynilad. My sister-in-law is hands-on when choosing the tenants, checking their monthly rentals, and getting all the problems that arises in the compound. All we do is sit here and wait for their monthly rental report. No stress! You help to give a living for others. Nice, right? To own a system?

I = Investor
In this sector, money is working for you. The best! Isn’t it? These are the people where compound interest is their best friend. Today it is easier to invest in real estate, stock market and bonds. Nowadays, many companies also offer mutual funds. But please be careful as a lot of scams ride the hype of investing. In this quadrant, you have more time to spend with your family. This is definitely a freedom we are looking for.


The cash flow quadrant is not just representing the flow of money coming in and out from the person, it also represents someone’s financial status. So I learned that there is a sector that Kiyosaki might missed out or just totally ignored it. Haha. It is the “U”.

U = Unemployed
Maybe Kiyosaki never include this sector because there is no inflow of money in this ring. But I want to highlight this status. Some are really unlucky and picky to land a job and some are very lazy to have one. And as my father always tells, if the people really wants to earn a living, there will always be a way. Unemployment is equal to laziness.

So please people! Wake up and work your a$$ off! Do not be a big liability to others.


Before the year ends, take some time to think over and start looking for opportunities for you and your family to go to the right side of the quadrant!  We can all do this! Pray and work hard!

I Love SMRT (Singapore's MRT System)

If you can see the  situation of citizens of other countries when riding their trains you will surely give thanks to Singapore government and SMRT for the service they are doing for the public. But good performance is not enough for this people behind SMRT, they are aiming for excellence that is why even LTA and NUS entered the scene in studying how to de-congest the trains on peak hours.

NUS announced a behavioral study on public who uses mrt  in their way to work. And I am a so lucky registrant to be picked as a participant. So how this does work? 

1. $15 voucher or ezlink top-up. It seems that this is a welcome treat for participants

2. $40 -- and everytime you tap-out from mrt at 8:15 a 20cents will be deducted to that. 

3. $25 full participation incentive after the study. 

Why I chose to join? Well, I want to go to office 30 minutes earlier to increase more my points on my clients' grading system. Yes! My clients have DLV that I need to key-in as early as possible to get a high grade. Second to lessen the stress for me; less people in the train, lesser stress. A fantastic way for me to discipline myself. Third to help in decongesting the train and lastly to avail the 2 privileges that was promoted by LTA (Travel Early, Travel Free & INSINC). 

Now it ends, I only failed once and was deducted a 20cents on my $40. For sure I will continue what I have begin. It is more refreshing and more fulfilling to travel early in the morning. 

Have You Asked Your Parents If They Are Proud Of You?

I'm always longing for a conversation with my mom. She can talk all day and night about her past. The past that holds her darkest time, my mom and dad's struggles, and how they mapped it to success.

My mom never got a chance to be in college. She really wants to finish studies and be an employee but she needs to assist my grandmother in everything they are in to. She told me that she even walked a mile selling fish to their neighbourhood. 

She went on to many hardships. She and her friends sold cooked food at employees in Philippines' Central Business District. She envied the staffs at first, the uniforms and well-groomed hair, high heels and the scents of their perfumes but when she befriend them and know how much they earn, a spark of hope lighted on her head. She earns more than the employees and inculcated in her mind that business will get you successful, financially, and not being an employee. 

Business after business until she settled for a second-hand lumber firm. When I was born all was okay. Mom and dad have spare money for all our the needs and wants. Mom provided insurances with mutual fund to dad and my two brothers. I had educational plan. When Ate reached her 18th birthday, a 4-storey building was built to be our new home. She bought parcels of land in different places for us to build our future houses when we got married. Would you imagine she even got a land for our final resting place or if we want to be cremated she got also lockers for our urns?

My mom have an Alzheimer and that disease is faster than it seems. Every time I call home, I always ask her, if she still knows me, if she still knew her past, if she knew what's happening around, if she knew my pains and my husband's success. And before hanging up the phone, I never forget to ask her if she is proud of me and my siblings. She always answers me back "Oo naman!" and one by one she will enumerate the reasons why.

After reciting her reasons she will next remind me of her golden rule. "Di baleng ikaw ang masaktan kesa ikaw ang makapanakit, di baleng ikaw ang niloko kesa ikaw manloko, di baleng ikaw ang nakawan wag lng ikaw ang magnakaw." When I was a child I always answered back "oo na, paulit-ulit naman" but now I really appreciate her rule. That made me and my siblings better persons.

That's how our talk goes every time I call. I love how satisfied she is when she remembers all her experiences and saw the fruit of her labour. 

Thanks Nanay for all the sacrifices, we are reaping the benefits today.

Holler "BUY-BUY!" to Great Singapore Sale 2014!

Great Singapore Sale or widely known as GSS is a yearly event. This is waited not just by Singaporeans but also all races in or out of the city state. Now 2014, it started last 30th of May and stretched until 27th of July. 

As always, I am excited for this. Why? Here I can shop guilt-free. Almost all of the boutiques raising their red "SALE" flag and dropping the prices for almost 80% off. Imagine that? Big savings right? 

I shop not only to refill my stocks of toiletries but also I do it to check-off the list for my holiday gifts. My husband and I are Filipino-expat, in this time we also buy some things that we can send to our relatives back in the Philippines.

Oh, do you know that some of the commodities in on-line shops were came from this great great sale? 

What are you waiting for? Fly in to Singapore and indulge in this event. :)

Are You Really Saving in Buying Coupons/Vouchers?

I will confess that I am voucher-dependent. Yes, I really saved a lot from purchasing those than paying the actual price. To tell you frankly, I subscribed to almost all of it from Groupon, Alldeals, Deals.com.sg and the list goes on. If you are following my facebook account and our couple's blog you can see from there the activities, salon, out of the country tours, and spa services we availed. 

If I am saving a lot from it, I also saw some of friends, colleagues and even acquaintances wasting money and their precious time in this platfrorm.

I cannot say that I am an expert but here are the tips that maybe can help you how to really saved money in buying those coupons. 

1. Ask your self first. Do you really need that item? When is your last manicure/pedicure/hair cut/hair color? Does your stress exceeds your limits that your muscles shouting for some massage? Is that buffet a good excuse to skip your diet?

Ask those questions and believe in your intution. The voice within will tell you that "Hey! You better not buy that."

2. Check the reputation of the merchant. This is a must! In getting some services and products we always wanted it to be a good one right? So ask from people who already availed it or read some blogs/reviews. 

3. Really? You are buying gadgets there? Why not at the IT show? Great discounts and more freebies.

4. Take a good look on these. Some deals are valid only to some group of people. Look on the list below.

a. Valid for first time customers only. 

b. Valid for male/female only.

c. They have specific IC holder that they want to serve.

d. Does your age qualify?

5. Going for a hair cut/color/perm/straightening? Is there any length limitation? Is the chemical they will be using okay with you? 

Massage? Is that the kind of massage you want them to do on your body? Any additional

payment if you will use their amenities?

6. Holiday trips! Yahoo! Check if the taxes, breakfast or even flights are included or not.

7. Of course, this is a great marketing strategy for all the merchants. Learn to say "No" if they present  some bundles of products and services. 

All you need is read, read and re-read all the terms and conditions. 

Oh, as I told you before, I am coupon enthusiast and above are the tips for you not to commit some of the mistakes I had gone with.

Below are the sites I really trusted and offers a great merchants for their deals. Happy shopping!

Deal.Com.Sg

Groupon Singapore 

To Shift or Not "Two" Shifts? That is the Question.

Just recently, we faced a battle and we succumbed by the fact that Abbey can't sustain the 1week rotating schedule. Officially announced this month the 2-week shifting for my husband. After almost 5 years staying in his company, the change came. I was shocked and the gloomy cloud of reality get in to my bubble of comfort. As always, I need to check the brighter side of this event. 

Good points I pondered:
1. As I hate my husband having a 10-day night shift, it is an extra money for us.. Hello to night differential. Kaching-kaching!

2. I called it dreaded EMEA shift. Why? I will go to office while Abbey is sleeping and he will be coming home too late and all he can see is me.. In my deep slumber. Brighter side? I can do a "me time".  Clean the room, kitchen, cabinets, etc. Oh, hello to Saturday dates.

3. For APAC, we will be going to office together and dinner date at nights. :) 

4. "I miss you" sms flooding both of our inboxes. 

If you will delve in all negative thoughts that succumbing life gives us there will be no good outcome we can treasure. Accept the facts, always look at the brighter side and focus more on the things you can control. You'll see life is more easier and more fun to handle with.

Buying Speculative Stocks Is Dangerous To Your Wealth

"Nay bumili ako ng URC stocks." - "Maganda yan nak".

Social media hyped the investing in the Philippine Stock Market and that caused a lot of people jumped into it in the first quarter of January. The result? A bull run that caused a lot of people to invest more in a wrong way.

What were the mistakes they had taken? (These are the rants that my husband and I read from the different forums)
1. They invested money that they know they will need in a very near future. 
2. They invested on stocks via hearsays.
3. Had never read any books or attended seminars on how to create a margin of safety.
4. And the most hurtful to read was, they loaned money from a bank to ride the bull.

And now... many people are now cursing PSE. Many people swore that they will not enter any transaction in stock market.

My mom bought stocks back then, so I have some ideas on how to manage and make money from it. Until now they are encashing dividends.
I hope that when the bear knock-out the bull last May 2013, many investors and newbies learned from others' failures.

As per saying by  "Buying speculative stocks is dangerous to your wealth". 

Please let me know if you have good book to read for investing or I can share some of the books that my hubby and I already read, just drop as an email, we will check if we have that ebook for you.

Money Can't Buy

Yes money can buy happiness. Now money can buy almost everything. Oh, even falling in love can be influenced by money.

But after my insanely awesome mother-in-law died, I just realized that time is one of the things money can't buy.

Do you know the feeling that your back is against the wall. No space to move, no other options to take but to wait and pray? In Mama Vangie's last minute I am just wishing that I bought a ticket back to Philippines a day earlier. In that my husband can hug and kiss her until her last breath. That we have more time to spend with her.

I know she understands us why we work here in Singapore but our heart is still longing for her, that we wish we can spend more minutes with her.

And on that event, we decided to work hard and invest harder. We want to go back in Philippines earlier than our targeted year of retirement. We want to see all our loved ones, we want to maximize all the seconds with them. We are hoping this plan will prosper... In His time.

Not a Very Good Liar

I would be a hypocrite to say if I will say that I never tell lies, ha, I am telling that I am not good at it. If you are one of my closest you will know the differences when I tell the truth and when I tell the untruth.

Here are some of the reasons why I do not want to tell a lie and you shouldn't too.

1. When I was a child, it was inculcated in my heart that telling a lie is a big sin. Well it was proved when I read it in the bible. (Ye are of your father the devil and the lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning and abode not in the truth because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar and the father of it.)

2. I lied about something and the product?.. Well another lie to conform the first fabrication. Very tiring. The truth will set you free, that's a proven fact. So when I grew up, its either you love me or you hate me because of transparency. This will explain why I only have few friends. Well, they are just the same like me. What you see is what you get.

3. When I say yes, it will be yes and no is no. I gain respect not only from the younger ones but from my father and mother.

4. Earning trust not only from family and friends but with my clients is big achievement for me. Lesser stress on their work when they are dealing with me. I am happy when they request for me to handle their shipments. Hey this is not only in Philippines but also clients here in Singapore.

5. I gain Abbey's heart. My job is a world full of men. In our 5 years of relationship he never went berserk caused by jealousy. Anytime he can use my phone, anytime he can go to my office unannounced and he is very confident in me.

This is a good trait that my parents passed to me and my siblings. We gain a good reputation in our place, achieved respect and trust. I am so thankful that they planted a seed on us, all things are more clear and the life is more easy to carry on.

I can see the people living in the darkness of lies, if only their parents be a good sample for them, maybe they are living an easier life today.