Not a Very Good Liar

I would be a hypocrite to say if I will say that I never tell lies, ha, I am telling that I am not good at it. If you are one of my closest you will know the differences when I tell the truth and when I tell the untruth.

Here are some of the reasons why I do not want to tell a lie and you shouldn't too.

1. When I was a child, it was inculcated in my heart that telling a lie is a big sin. Well it was proved when I read it in the bible. (Ye are of your father the devil and the lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning and abode not in the truth because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar and the father of it.)

2. I lied about something and the product?.. Well another lie to conform the first fabrication. Very tiring. The truth will set you free, that's a proven fact. So when I grew up, its either you love me or you hate me because of transparency. This will explain why I only have few friends. Well, they are just the same like me. What you see is what you get.

3. When I say yes, it will be yes and no is no. I gain respect not only from the younger ones but from my father and mother.

4. Earning trust not only from family and friends but with my clients is big achievement for me. Lesser stress on their work when they are dealing with me. I am happy when they request for me to handle their shipments. Hey this is not only in Philippines but also clients here in Singapore.

5. I gain Abbey's heart. My job is a world full of men. In our 5 years of relationship he never went berserk caused by jealousy. Anytime he can use my phone, anytime he can go to my office unannounced and he is very confident in me.

This is a good trait that my parents passed to me and my siblings. We gain a good reputation in our place, achieved respect and trust. I am so thankful that they planted a seed on us, all things are more clear and the life is more easy to carry on.

I can see the people living in the darkness of lies, if only their parents be a good sample for them, maybe they are living an easier life today.

There's Always a Reason Why You Love Someone

You probably can't fathom why you love a person, why you always want him beside you despite of the differences and hurt that he had given you. Am I so foolish to say that if you love someone there should be a reason behind it?

I am on a flight to Manila, an hour delayed. Damn it!  Abbey and I were apart for one week. I succeeded to live but that 7 days, I know from my heart I am incomplete.

1. I stayed for half an hour and so to office, why? Nothing to do at home. I remember myself when I was a single, now I know why I work literally for whole day back then and just go back home for a shower.

2. Eating alone. Dining out alone is bearable, but i miss eating Filipino cuisine every night, which Abbey cooked for me.

3. Watching. I was doing this thing for 27 years... but when Abbey and I moved in, watching tv series and movies with my husband is better than hugging a bag of chips while laughing at comedy shows alone

4. Packed lunch is Abbey's forte. I miss it a lot, great thing my colleagues were there to buy food

for me at hawkers.

5. Nothing beats a strong arms around me while I am on sleep. Oh baby I miss the breathtaking hug.

6. As almost all the gals is saying, guys hate it when girls were on shopping. Abbey loves to go with me, walk around the mall and look for the thingy I am hunting for. The best part is, he pays for it. 

7. I was always showered by compliments by my husband but it will be more appreciated if it comes with a peck on my forehead  or a slap on my butt.. Haha.

8. Surprises! Oh darling! 

I really miss my guy. But being apart is a blessing, it made me realize what are things I should be thankful for.

Why I Bid Goodbye in Purchasing Belle de Jour Power Planner or Acquiring a Free Starbucks Planner

I am a great great fan of planners ever since I set my foot in the corporate world. From that time my boss gave me a Guess planner, I am really hooked up to the help it gave me for my day-to-day life.

Am I addicted to always have this kind of notebook? Yes! I feel so incomplete if I do not have a planner. I can't live without it but mid-year of 2013, I decided to shake off that feeling of emptiness and left my 2013 BDJ planner at home.  

Here are the reasons why I do not buy any planners from now on:
1. I realized that the Starbucks or coffee cafe free planner really costs me a lot of money, yes it is free but for me who is not fan of their coffees, it will take me about a thousand pesos to have that for free.

2. BDJ Planners is a very cute planner and a lot of vouchers inside. I saw the 2013 issue and I am really disappointed. Dati sa Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf and Ace Water Spa bawi mo na yung almost Php600.00 mo. Ngayon, di na ganun kaganda and valuable ang mga vouchers inside. 

3. Planners are so heavy inside my bag, taking it out made a big difference on the weight. Now, I just use the S Note for my doodles or save the links I need to remember in my phone.

4. The ultimate "why" I bid goodbye ay, now that I am already married, its my duty to let my husband know my schedules and vise versa. So instead to buy a pocket planner for him, I went back to my college days where I do not have money to buy those planner and yet need to have an organise myself to finish all my projects before the target date.
From June 2013, we use my own version of calendar. I usually use recycled paper  then use excel to create a table. No fuss, just spend for a small amount of ink in the printer and tadahhhhh! Two persons, in one piece of paper, can see all the events. We can give way to each other and not compromise any schedules.

Maybe this will help the couples out there. 

Oh, this is just above our light switch so we can see all the must-to-do before facing a new day!. :) 

My Wish Came True

I have seen few countries here in Asia and I am very awed on the their differences. I think back then when can my siblings experience what I have felt being a tourist in a foreign land.

So when I landed a job, married and pretty stable, Abbey and I planned to bring all our siblings to be a tourist here in Singapore... for free.

Usapan namin, each year one kapatid plus one, its up to them who they will choose. That will be an all-expense paid, I will be in-charge in all even for their pasalubongs for our parents and other siblings. Personal things and pasalubong to other people, that one they must bear.

Before they go here, I asked them what are the main sights they want to see or events they want to attend, well, this proved that we, every child of my parents, have different interests in life. Read on and see for yourself, haha! 

My first visitors: Ate Sol and Baste. This is the luckiest pair, why?, because I do not have work back then, so I am with them, see how lucky they were! Haha! 3 days in total of jam-packed schedule. 

They experience The Flyer, Night Safari, Universal Studios, Fountain of Wealth, of course the Merlion Park, Orchard Road, The Marina Bay SkyPark and The Songs of the Sea.

Second: Our eldest, Kuya Ric with his only son Joshua P. Mangila, (buong-buo diba?) haha! As per request, Kuya want to stay for a week.. granted! He wants to see the parks, granted! So they visited to Istana and Jurong Bird Park, MacRitchie Reservoir, My Waterways @ Punggol, Punggol Promenade, Sengkang Sports & Recreation Centre, Punggol Reservoir, Marina Barrage, Mt. Faber National Park. 

We even went out Singapore to see Melaka Malaysia, Singapore Flyer and  got the chance to visit the Singapore's National Library. They ate at Lau Pa Sat. They also have the opportunity to buy our weekly grocery at Sheng Siong. One day of USS, saw a movie at the newly built JCube back then, and visited IKEA.

The last but not the least, Kuya Laleng with his wife. F1 race even outside the fence was all he wants. He told me he just like to hear the revving engines, well, his wish was given to him and upgraded it to BayStand ticket. 

They saw the Singapore Botanic Gardens, Bukit Batok Nature Park, a tour at Marina Barrage, they check-out the Ulu Pandan Connector Park, experienced the Gogreen Segway Eco Adventure, we raced on Luge and went up, up and away with Skyride. 

They walked at Marina Bay Sands The Shoppes and even experienced a free movie premiere of The Rush. They dined at hawkers and had a lunch buffet at Bay Hotel.

Actually, this is my wish... my wish for my siblings. Wish that came true. I am so thankful to The Almighty One for giving me this opportunity to share the blessings with my siblings! 

Love you mga Kuya and Ate ko! 

MONSTERS UNITE

Yes! I am a monster.

I am a strict and all-must-know girlfriend. He do not have any privacy on me and I have the "I am the only right attitude". I nagged him, even our neighbors heard I am cursing him.

No-secrets policy. Before he does anything he must ask for my permission. If I cannot go to an event or place he should stay home too. I want phone calls before he sleeps and a ring before he could open his eyes from slumber. I want a date weekly, monthsary letters and surprises. I am super sensitive. 

I am not a touchy person, public display of affection is a big NO. I am not a pleaser. I want all my commands will be executed in a second. Everything should be done for me and only me.. I want to be his center of love and attention.. No other people must penetrate our space. 

...And I met Abbey, again. A self-made monster!.. A sensitive, "us" policy person, must know all, he wants all of my attention and time, loves surprises, missives are overflowing, respect is a must. He never went to a place or event without me, communication is compulsory, pleaser, fond of PDA, he wants to be always prioritized. A commander. 

Yes we are both monsters... monsters united in love.

My Card ... Our Best Friend

I know guys that you know that credit cards really create magic. Just a simple swipe all things you want will be instantly yours. But do you know many people now suffer because of using of those plastics and many are maximizing and enjoying having it? 

I am BDO credit card holder for I think almost 8 years but my credit limit never increased. I can feel their fury on me and I am loving it  haha. Every time I swipe my card, I see to it that I have already the money in my bank account. Why? I want the amount to stay there until end of month to increase the deposit and could make more savings interest. Then I
will pay it in full. No balances is equal to no interest, no extra charges and fees. I also demanded to waive off their annual fee, and they agreed. 

Here in Singapore, my husband have Citibank SMRT card. Since it is his first time to use one, I educate him how to manage it. With a good credit background many banks now offering him to get a loan which we always refused. We also received great points that we can redeemed for dining and grocery vouchers.

I treat my card as my best friend. Never borrow money unless really necessary and always pay all your debt or else the friendship will be torn and wasted. 

You? How do you treat your credit cards? If you don't want your life a living nightmare do not use your credit card to spend today your tomorrow's money.

My Insanely Awesome Mother-in-Law

Its very hard to please everbody... most specially mothers-in-law. If you will search the internet about MIL, you will see how many rants the daughters-in-law to their second mothers. And ang tanging bilin sa akin ng nanay ko ay ibuhos ko na sa kanya ang kamalditahan ko at wag sa magiging byenan ko.  My mom felt the pure love of her parents-in-law to her and vice-versa and of course I want to be like that on my byenan.

When I met Mrs. Lapuz, I felt how she loves Abbey. She always asked back then if I really love her son. She frankly told me that my looks were deceiving, and she don't like me because I look so snob. 

First meeting, she cried in front of me and I listened to tales. In one meeting, Tita Sweet got my attention, my care and my heart. I told to myself, this is the mother-in-law I want to be with for the rest of my life. 

Well, I call her "Sweet", why? Should I further explain it to you? For almost 5 years of relationship with Abbey I never saw her shout in anger, she always hugs me when I go to their home as if I was gone for years, she kisses me a lot, she treats me as her own daughter, she buys me stuffs... Hey! I even have my own set of clothes in their home in Bulacan. Mama Sweet is always there for me if I need somebody to be with sa aming pampering sessions, she always explains why Abbey acted weird sometimes. And the unforgettable, when I got sick in their home, she took care of me, she even massages me and gave a breakfast in bed. 

Yeah, yeah, jealous I got this kind of mother-in-law? She is really an awesome person. A total package, a mother and a girl friend in one. 

Thanks Mama for everyting lalo na sa pagpapalaki at pag-aalaga mo ng maayos kay Abbey hanggat 'di pa ako dumarating sa buhay nya. I love you so much Mama Sweet. You are one in a million. Mama ako pa rin ang number 1 mo na manugang ha? Haha! 

We miss you Ma! Hope to see you sa 1st birthday ni DomDom. Let's go for some manicure and pedicure ;) 

Wedding Invitations from Zazzle

We were quite amazed that our posts in our wedding blog touched thousand of people's lives around the globe. As the mission of that blog is to show the whole wide world our love to each other and also to help some of couple out there to plan their wedding.

Few weeks ago, we received an email about some paid photo posting at our wedding invite post. 

To tell you frankly, that would be our first time to accept that kind of offer. As we checked the site Chris send to us, Abbey and I agreed to post the photo and post the link. 

Honestly, we don't expect if Chris will not send to us the payment, but he did.. ;) 

Thanks Chris.. Please check zazzle.com it caters a lot of things not only affordable invitations.

Target Achieved

This May was really a mind-blowing month for me and my hubby.

When 2013 stepped up on our lives, I told my husband that on this year we must focus more on our careers and money matters. Last two years of our marriage, we promised to enjoy and spend time with each other's company. We traveled, explore different kinds of foods and attended events, and this year we agreed to focus on our jobs and investments.

I really thought that it will take us a year to achieve our career target, but only 5 months, Almighty One blessed and granted the desires of our heart. Abbey was promoted as team lead in UBS, I am so happy, I know he deserved it...I am envy of him, while I received a salary increment and Abbey is so envious of that. Haha!

In investments, Abbey now religiously buying shares of his choice, while I am still torn between two companies to complete my "Power of Five" firms. I received dividends and Abbey may received his second on last week of June. Another investment is now materializing, we are expecting that to be finished before October. :)

Our hopes were blessed. I am so lucky to have Abbey.... to have him on my side while placing each piece of our puzzle for our target retirement age.

Thanks to our employers and colleagues who believed on us. Thanks to the community that keeps us informed, well educated and updated. And most specially, gratitude to our family & friends for continuous prayers and support on our plans.

The Power of Giving

Do you want to receive more?, then give more. I am not saying that you must only give to people you wish to receive something, well where is the wisdom and holiness in that?

You want to be loved? Learned to give more love unto others?

You want to receive a ton of blessings? Be a blessings to others.

You want your business to be successful? Give the right benefits for your employees.

You want to acquire a great knowledge? Teach what you already know.

You want to be respected? Respect even a child.

You want to be happy? Be happy for your enemy's achievements.

You want to be successful in every aspect of life? Pray to Holy Above and take care of your parents.

Be a generous giver and you will be a great receiver.

Let's Count the Blessings!

I am 30 and I know it. I am old, yeah I admit it and I am happy. Since January 2013, I keep on thinking what achievements that I had done with the past 3 decades. So here are some to summarize..

Family: My parents, nobody can replace them in my heart. They're the best parents for me; they know how to spoil and how to teach me a lesson. They know what makes me happy and what makes me really mad. My father taught me the importance of inner scorecard, to choose friends wisely and how to be frugal in money. My mom is always there for me. I know I got her style in dressing and the thinking that wife must not be totally dependent to their husbands on finances. She also taught us how important to own your own house and lot.

            My siblings are the best! Even they want to choke me to death because of brat attitude, they are always there to be my guide and be my models. We grew up in different generations and believe in different religions but in relation to our different manners, we understand each other.

            In-Laws: Abbey came from a well-intact and very sweet family. I am so thankful to be part of their growing family. So thankful to have a very kind and very sweet new set of parents and siblings.

            Friends: They proved to all of the people that are around us that they are not after my money. Ha! Hey!, they are richer than me. :) Truly, my set of friends is a gem to cherish. It seems that we knew each other since birth. Love you all! 

Education: I am an ordinary student constantly in Section 1, until I came to the point to see what subject I will excel, and that is Physics... The subject that almost everyone hates. For the first time, I joined a quiz bee and won the first price. I garnered the Best in Science Award & Mercury Drug Awardee. In college, I took up the Bachelor of Science in Customs Administrations for 3 1/2 years. With tears, I passed the board exam with an average of 81%.

Career: At the age of 26, I became the supervisor of a certain company, went to Malaysia, China, Indonesia, Vietnam and Cambodia for procuring. Be known in the Bureau of Customs. The latest is that here in Singapore, after sending my particulars at 3PM, 5PM on the same day the Ministry approved my application. Now I am working happily with in my current company for more than a year, with great boss, great colleagues and very cooperative clients.

Finances: As my usual when I am working back in Philippines, 50% is directly going to my other account as my savings. Now it is not 50%, now I can save for 80% of my earnings, (achievement indeed). Now you know why I want all to be free, haha!  Me and my husband have some investments also, getting ready and wishing for an early retirement.

Love Life: When I am counting my blessings, I count Abbey twice. Actually, I do not need to explicate why. Every person me and my husband knew always told me that I am lucky to have Abbey. Always replying them, "I am not lucky, I am BLESSED."

In past 30 years, I had gone many trials; some told me that it is a failure but for me that is only a lesson to ponder and to get ready for another challenge for me to succeed. 

Prayers is my only armor for the future and I am hoping that we can use all the lessons of the past to jump over the hurdle of trials.

Influenced Not Controlled

I don't need to explain anything about my choice who to be with after my parents met Abraham. No words can define how good my man is. He never changed his nice qualities and altered some for better. Isn't it good?

My family and specially my mom is totally happy on my transformation. They are telling that my attitude really was modified. They say, now I learned how to express my feelings. Maybe! Haha!

I think Abbey and I influenced each other... a lot! When there's differences we are taking a deep breath then lay it on our center for us to solve it. Every decision, every move; in everything we both decide. We influenced each other but not controlled.

Thank you baby for very peaceful years with you.

7 out of 10 Marital Break Ups Are Caused By Money Problems

Yes, you read it right 7 out of 10 couples breakup is due to money. So, are you one of those who broke their vows? Are you just a couple for better and not for worse? Well, this is not limited to legally married, boyfrien-girlfriend relationship is not exempted with these.

A lot of girls jumping out once they saw a wealthier man that they can be with. Now love is not so important unlike the last decades, how much someone is earning is more valuable in finding a partner now. The common term for this is "practicality".

Couple finances is a big issue as of today. Who will handle one's money, who will do the budgeting and how much they will help to each other's family. Me and my hubby never talked about this before tying the knot. Unspoken words is better than setting many rules.

Me and husband have different accounts, we handle our own salaries. We shares our blessings with our own pockets. But everything we do regarding money was placed before the scrutiny of each before we do the dealings.

As I can say, the key thing here is communication. Let your partner know how much you both earn, how much you spend. Transparency will never be a hindrance for a clearer future as husband and wife.

Miles Away

Isn't nice to see all your siblings, hug them, sing along with them, play jokes, laugh and reminisce together and I am really glad to see the big smiles and grins from my husband's face when he saw his sisters, brother and parents. He really did missed them a lot.

Sis Abi is staying at Chicago, Sis Beth at Bulacan and RJ works at Abu Dhabi, now Mama and Papa's Visa for America is out and now getting ready for their flight. Abbey's happiness faded and the sky of Singapore cries with him from early morning until night of 19th of January '13.

I can say that messengers and photos helps cure homesickness but cannot deeply suffice the space in our hearts.

Now, I appreciate more that my parents and siblings are just only 3 hours plane ride, that anytime I can or they can visit us here in Dover.

All the best Ate Abigail, Kuya Victor, RJ, and Jhen. We'll see you soon Ate Beth, Kuya Bong and DomDom. Everything will be okay Mama Sweet and Papa RS. We are looking to be with all of you, in HIS perfect time.

Make or Break

Social networks will either make or break you. The primary vision of this sites is to you unite and connect each people we want to, but some of us abused the functions of those.


I heard a lot of story how a long lost people saw and talk each other again, many people got their love story through facebook and many news and discoveries were read due to daily updates on their walls. But all those good things have an opposite and dark side of this facebook. Many people's heart was broken up, many studies was failed, many friends separated their ways, families on angst, many identity theft was done, many lies, and so on.

There are few times that I want to delete my account, why?,  all I see on people's update are their rants about their siblings, parents, studies, job and most specially about their relationship to opposite sex. Even the TV patrol and 24 Oras pages were unliked due to almost every hour updating about negative things in Philippines.

Several times I asked my husband but he opposed the idea of deleting the account, this is the easiest way to connect and have the fresh updates from our siblings and families and to propagate what happening in our blogs. So the solution we took was to unchecked all the news feeds that coming from unnecessary people in our accounts.

I hope many people will use networking sites correctly. Think hard before posting guys. ;)

Boudoir: Makeup by Allets and Photography by Mella Tan

It was just a year and look at her now, she is one of the known Filipino make-up artist here in Singapore. I saw her how she started this passion, the love of making herself and others feel confident and beautiful. That industry she chose was packed with oldies on that business but due to persistent and constant pushing of her friends, she reached her goal. Ate (sister in English) Allets is a mom of two and supervises people in a banking industry at Changi.

How I met her? She was our housemate for three years. OMG, this photoshoot was long planned but because of our busy schedule due to work and family that was the only time we had dealt to clear up out schedule just for this daring/holloween snaps.

At first I thought she will do a make up for me and she will be the one also doing the camera clicking, when I got home, her friend Ate Mella is there, another OMG, working for two professionals made me thinking if I can do exactly what I want. I took a shower to lower down the tension brewing inside me. Haha. Now they know the reason why I done that. Sorry for keeping you waiting for another minute. ;)

After I wore my small clothes, I paved my way to them and sat down in front of Ate Allets to wave her magic hands on me. 25minutes passed she asked me to go their room and we will start the session. Haha, maybe Ate Mella saw that I quite stressed to that idea, she asked me to relax. Then one hour of snapping filled with laughter was done. Thankie.

Those were the photos taken by Ate Mella.

They are not only for models, they had done also some weddings. You can see some of their works at their facebook page and wall.

I am simple girl but they bring out the confidence out of me. I hope sisters this will not be the last.

Makeup by Allets

HP: 98008490

makeupbyallets@yahoo.com.sg

Mella Tan

mellatan@gmail.com

http://mellablogged.com

Blessed To Have An Options

Luck? No! I am blessed... So blessed to have an outstanding parents, a very hardworking mom and dad.

To tell all my readers, I have three siblings and they were given each a lumber store to manage. Well I am thankful for that family business that was from my grandparents, from there we grew up and exposed in managing people and money but as the saying goes, mother knows best, and here I am, stressing all my effort to work for a company that I didn't own. In short, they don't gave me a store to manage. Haha. It's okay, doing business is not my forte. :)

So yes, I work for different companies, yes all the success and yes, all difficulties from it was seen by my parents. They knew how I tried my limits up to the extent that I can be jailed from it. Haha.

So when I went here in Singapore, as I told to my last post, I had culture-shock and tried for months to cope up, but my grip on the happenings is not enough, and when I knew that I am totally burned out, I called my parents, tears flowing non-stop and all I can say was "Can i resign?"; they answered, calmed as ever, "You can. Go back here. Rest. Still we have a living to support you." When I am breaking up to my firm stand. my parents are always there to catch me. Now,  I am married, the Almighty added another person to take care of me. That time when Abbey entered our room, saw me talking with my parents and clearing all the tears, he just looked at me with soft eyes and before I hang up the phone, he asked me to hand it over and  talked with my mom and dad. He wrapped his arms around me tight and say, "We can live here even you don't have a work. Print a resignation letter. Take your time to rest. It is okay for me if you do or do not have a job. I will do everything to provide all your needs." After hearing that, water flows again on cheeks and I felt the security from my ever loving husband.

I am really blessed to have an options, work or not to work, but after 4 months staying at home, I felt so idle, so dumb and then when offer came last December, I immediately grabbed with Abbey's approval.

Prayed to have kind boss and easy-to-get-along colleagues. Answered prayer. Another experience to ponder. Truly blessed, my life... my career, my love and my family.

Let's Talk About "EX"

Worst comes to worst, if we need to separate our ways and end our marriage do you think we still can be friends? Abbey blurted immediately "YES"..

As what I say to my post, I am not used to burning bridges, and my boyfriends and ex-fiance is not exception to that. I keep my line open to them and even to their new linking, until..

I cannot get it, why the new girls wants me to explain why I ended up my relationship to their boys. This occurred to me twice. The first one, the girl phoned me and asking anything about her boy, she is quite nice to me and I am too to her. How she got my number, that I don't have an idea. This time, its quite amusing, miles away then she reached me through messenger, yahoo ID popped in and all along I thought that was ex-fiance but a wrong choice of words were done and caught her up.

I really cannot understand why this lady keep on asking why me and her boy ended a 10 year relationship. Is there any enough reason that can suffice all the mingling thought she have in her mind. Even hurtful sentences were slammed to me, all I replied to her is... "Just believe all the things told to you by your partner regarding to our past.". But queries still keep on coming, then all I can do is bid goodbye and end that conversation.

Well, for me, she should be thankful enough for the things that happened to me and her boy and by this, she have him as her own. Me, I am thankful for all the past of my husband.

Past really makes you stronger and you will learn a lot from it. If you just accept all the misdoings done.

Unless... the heart is still dwelling in that past and not ready to move on...

I Lost My Center

Silence of suffering thumping my head, every movement is a misery. A meter walk path seems one mile, each steps gave a buzzing headache and gigantic dizziness.

It was my first ladies night out at Clarke Quay and and I literally drunk all cocktail that I can, I think I have more than 7 servings. I drunk a lot because it seems that concoction do not have enough alcohol to persuade my center, but I am wrong. As I walked my way out from Aquanova, dizziness dawned on. Alcohol targeted my balance and nothing I can do but to clung and trust my husband's arm.

In MRT, there, I totally lost my composure and throw up. Mint candy didn't help. Luckily, I have this plastic bag where even myself can be fitted in. Since it almost midnight, few people is in the train, I threw up but no one seems to see me, no one seems to care. I am pretty wasted.

Alighting at MRT and the 3 minutes walk to our flat seems forever.  My husband attempted to carry me but I insisted to walk my way to our building. In our sanctuary, I threw up again and passed out. Then my brain shut down.

I woke with new shirt, my make up was removed and plenty of mints in my bag. Shyness was all I felt towards Abbey and vowed to myself that would be the last intoxication in my life.

At work, I hurriedly rang Abbey's handphone every now then asking for forgiveness. Even he got to his office, conscience bugging me and I want to cover the anxiety that I felt for myself.  He asked me to stop and he told me that everything was fine. Nothing changed. But I know, that was really a big turn-off.

When I got home from the worst day ever I had in my career(not due to stress but from hangover), I saw the flowers and a note on our table. Very touching and sincere. I am the worst and most wasted girl I can ever think of that night, but my huband's missive lifted me up. His letter says if it will happen again, we will take a cab rather than a train. Haha! Ooops, he even cooked pork nilaga for me. :)

Sorry, this will not happen again. Right hand up!

3 Days of Blindness

What a wonderful world!, isn't? But how will someone say this phrase if they are blind. Black all around. I was moved by this article of Helen Keller  first published last ---. Helen made a list a of the things she wants to do if she'll be given a sense of sight in three days. Reading that, I am quite shocked, there are so many things that I am taking for granted. Actually almost everything around me was not appreciated.

I know, these eyes is a vital part of human being but If Almighty will take out my eyes, what will I do in three days. Just thinking, my gosh, all negative thoughts rushing down in me. But I need to look on a brighter side.

Okay, on the first day, I will wake up 7am and stay at my room, I will embrace the full hour of silence. Then I will ask my husband to come near me and I will try to memorize his face features, I will try to communicate with him and ask him all questions I can ask and memorize the ups and downs of his voice. I will try to determine if he is happy, sad, sincere through the words and voice that will left his mouth, that will last until noon and my whole afternoon, I will ask my niece and nephews to gather around at my parents place and all I want to do is hear all their voices. All the shouts of joy of the kids and laughter's of reminiscing. We will take dinner and savor all the aroma of the foods. I will eat all the food I can take and slowly chew every bit of it. In evening I will ask my husband to play some Mozart music and ask him to teach me how to find my boxes of teas and how to prepare it for myself.

Second day, I will ask my friends to bring me to a beach, I will sunbathe. I want to feel the morning rays of the sun and  hear the sounds of gushing waves. After lunch I nap just outside a cottage. Why outside? I want to feel the summer breeze. Around dawn I want me and my friends help me to stroll along the shore, I want to feel the hotness of every grains of the sand on my feet. On dinner I will ask them to build a bonfire and have a dinner and sip some red wine. I will spend all my time to listen to their stories and I will just move mouth to speak once they ask me. Haha.

On my 3rd day, I want to be one with nature, I want to go to a park and want to conquer my fear to lizards. Eeeeeee! I want to inhale fresh oxygen from the plants. My afternoon to my last hour of darkness, I want to be with my husbands arm. I want to listen to the Words from Bible.

As I made a thought for that idea, who says darkness is sadness? Now, I will start to appreciate more on the things around me before the unseen comes. Why? everything I can see here in earth is temporal and the unseen is yet to come and eternal.

While we look not at the things which are seen, but at the things which are not seen: for the things which are seen are temporal; but the things which are not seen are eternal. - 2 Corinthians 4:18