Sunday, June 17, 2012

I Lost My Center

Silence of suffering thumping my head, every movement is a misery. A meter walk path seems one mile, each steps gave a buzzing headache and gigantic dizziness.

It was my first ladies night out at Clarke Quay and and I literally drunk all cocktail that I can, I think I have more than 7 servings. I drunk a lot because it seems that concoction do not have enough alcohol to persuade my center, but I am wrong. As I walked my way out from Aquanova, dizziness dawned on. Alcohol targeted my balance and nothing I can do but to clung and trust my husband's arm.

In MRT, there, I totally lost my composure and throw up. Mint candy didn't help. Luckily, I have this plastic bag where even myself can be fitted in. Since it almost midnight, few people is in the train, I threw up but no one seems to see me, no one seems to care. I am pretty wasted.

Alighting at MRT and the 3 minutes walk to our flat seems forever.  My husband attempted to carry me but I insisted to walk my way to our building. In our sanctuary, I threw up again and passed out. Then my brain shut down.

I woke with new shirt, my make up was removed and plenty of mints in my bag. Shyness was all I felt towards Abbey and vowed to myself that would be the last intoxication in my life.

At work, I hurriedly rang Abbey's handphone every now then asking for forgiveness. Even he got to his office, conscience bugging me and I want to cover the anxiety that I felt for myself.  He asked me to stop and he told me that everything was fine. Nothing changed. But I know, that was really a big turn-off.

When I got home from the worst day ever I had in my career(not due to stress but from hangover), I saw the flowers and a note on our table. Very touching and sincere. I am the worst and most wasted girl I can ever think of that night, but my huband's missive lifted me up. His letter says if it will happen again, we will take a cab rather than a train. Haha! Ooops, he even cooked pork nilaga for me. :)

Sorry, this will not happen again. Right hand up!

No comments: